“I do”… “I don’t”
A Late Marriage, an award-winning Israeli film set in the Georgian community of Tel Aviv, tells the funny and infuriating story of a family’s machinations to get their spoiled, 31-year-old son married to a suitable girl, which in their world means a young virgin. But when they discover he is instead having a hot love affair with Judith, a beautiful Moroccan divorcee who is—horrors!—34, and has a child, they take the matter into their own hands. When an aunt asks his mother if she would be against Judith without the kid, the mother, played by director Dover Kosashvili’s own mother, answers: “She could be made of gold. No divorcee under my root!” The blatant misogyny of the world depicted in this film may roil your gut, but it is well worth seeing for its perfectly calibrated depiction of a slice of Israeli society.
An entirely different take on marriage is Wedding Advice: Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace, an independent film by Karen Sosnoski and Fred Zeytoonjian, who have lived together for 19 years without getting married. The film interviews various unconventional experts on this ever-agonizing subject. One expert represents an organization dedicated to finding alternatives to marriage. Lively moments in the film include anti-gay activists heckling participants at a gay marriage rally. Dear to our hearts is former Lilith editor Sarah Blustain, talking about her landmark article—from LILITH’s special weddings section [Spring 2000]—on why she doesn’t want to get married.
Finally, for the sheyne kalle (beautiful bride) who might choose as a wedding gift a book entitled 101 Nights of Great Sex over a set of matching dishes, Good Vibrations, a San Francisco-based sex toy store, is now offering its bridal registry online: www.goodvibes.com.