A Novel Takes on Tradwife Culture
The perfect influencer life isn’t real. We know that behind the pristine (or #blessed) Instagram reels there is an army of invisible nannies, teachers, housecleaners, bakers, set designers, caption writers and content managers.
So we know what Jo Piazza’s influencer/tradwife thriller makes clear in the on-the-nose title: Everyone is Lying to You (Dutton, $15.20). But it doesn’t matter that those perfect pictures are obviously filtered and cropped. The feelings they inspire—of inspiration, aspiration, longing, jealousy, contempt—are real. Former college best friends Lizzie and Bex are our protagonists. Lizzie is a writer holding on to her magazine job by a thread (partly because of influencers, who “did sort of help destroy our industry.”) Bex is—at least according to her beautifully curated and lucrative Instagram feed—doing better. Now officially known as Rebecca Sommers but really known to her millions of followers as @BarefootMamaLove, Bex is a highly successful influencer whose ranching life Lizzie secretly(ish) follows while trying to get a hint as to why Bex abandoned their friendship.
But we already know the answer, because we already know that these perfect packaged lives are rarely what they seem, especially for women occupying the tradwife niche (see the article in this issue, p. 20). As Piazza makes extremely clear, even highly successful CEOs of their own brands are victims of the patriarchy they are paid so much to endorse. Piazza does a lot of telling about the difficulties of Bex’s life. Bex shoots the week’s content on Thursdays, and “I change outfits seven times to make sure I have something different on for every video.” She “guzzles” coffee before promoting “the non-caffeinated coffee…to make massive amounts of money.”
lie in the expected ways, but in other ones that, for those paying attention, perhaps ought also to be expected. The hints aren’t subtle; Bex has to “keep my sunglasses on as I circle the pool.” We know this story, and we know how it can end. But with Lizzie’s help, Bex wants to write a different conclusion. So she invites Lizzie to MomBomb (yes), a big influencer conference, to cover a big new announcement, and, of course, to finally reconcile with a woman she once called sister. She needs Lizzie’s help to take her five kids and escape her abusive husband for good. Bex has a plan, but, much like her fake life, it’s never that easy.
It makes for a gripping read, though the mystery isn’t all that complicated or surprising. The women in it—their strength, their sophistication, the very aspects that make them able to be CEOs who pretend to be submissive wives—are complicated, but most people don’t notice, because, “every story written about [Bex] calls her a housewife instead of mentioning that she’s the CEO of a multimedia, multinational brand.” But that’s by design, as Lizzie points out: “She’s been selling herself as a homemaker and housewife in order to make massive amounts of money.” Piazza makes the unmasking of influencers’ life and lies feel dangerously fun, even as she paints her characters, many of whom are victims and survivors, with a sensitive and empathetic brush. There is just enough winking to various real-life influencers (I don’t even have Instagram and I know immediately who the model for @BarefootMamaLove must be) to almost feel like a roman-à-clef, except we know it’s made up. It doesn’t matter. We still love to believe.
Sharrona Pearl is the Andrews Endowed Chair of Interdisciplinary Studies at TCU. Her most recent book is Mask (Bloomsbury Academic).
